« Visited States Map - Cool | Main | Dog name »

Guy Down The Street update

I've heard an allegory about a "Guy Down The Street" that anti-war activists like to tell about mean old Bush took out mean old Saddam. Here's my version:

A crazy guy down the street goes to his neighbor's house and shoots one of the neighbor's kids with a rocket-propelled grenade and threatens the rest of the neighborhood with the same treatment.

The police come and shoo him back to his house but do not arrest him or take him away. He loudly threatens to use an RPG on anybody who comes after him. The police respond by requiring him to surrender all his RPG's and let them check his house and certify it RPG-free, or they'll come in after him and take him to jail. To show their seriousness, they order the mailman to stop delivering to his house.

The police show up to perform the search. The neighbor refuses them entrance to more than one room at a time, and every time they move toward the basement he kicks them out, loudly proclaiming that he has no RPG's. Then when they get back to the station, he calls all the neighbors and says, "See how my RPG's scared the cops away? By the way, I don't like *your* kids either!" He also takes out a PO box and starts getting his mail there instead of at the house.

Meanwhile, you're growing nervous about this guy. Another crazy guy two streets over, a close friend and associate of the original crazy guy, took out 20 of his neighbors' houses with a homemade bomb.

You do a quick calculation and you notice that your house is not within range of the RPG's this guy says he has. Well, that's nice, but your kids like to play at some houses well within the guy's range. All the while, he's saying that anybody who tries to take action will get an RPG up their butt for their trouble. You and the other neighbors notice he's also got a pile of dead kids in his backyard, some of them killed with RPG's. You go to the police and demand they take action; they say they can't do it alone. You offer to help, and they say you're not allowed to do anything without them. You tell them you're going to take action and ask them for help; they refuse.

You go and lock the guy up. He hides in his childrens' room and you accidentally kill one of his kids in the process of taking him away. You then determine that the guy doesn't have any RPG's in the house after all, but he has credit card slips for 1000 RPG's which were scheduled to arrive at the PO Box whenever he wanted them.

What should the police do to you now?


TrackBack

TrackBack URL for this entry:

Comments

I think the police should give you a nice doughnut, and urge you to stick closer to church-oriented activities.

Comments

Joe,

Pick up the guitar, put down the zuchini.

Comments

No es un zuchini, es una rutabaga.

Comments

Verdad? Pienso que "rutabaga" es "nubo de suecia" en Espanol.

At least, that's how we always said it back at SGHS, based on the well-thumbed diccionario.

Post a comment

(If you haven't left a comment here before, you may need to be approved by the site owner before your comment will appear. Until then, it won't appear on the entry. Thanks for waiting.)